By: Kacie Starr Long
I was in the midst of an ugly cry.
The kind of cry that smears your makeup and where snot runs into your mouth, but I didn't care. My husband and I were running late to church, and somewhere between route 367 and highway 270, I decided to bare my heart to my husband.
"Babe, I just feel so confused right now," I moaned. "I...I..just thought I was past this."
I let out another belly moan in the passenger seat, as my husband looked in my direction and quietly said, "You are in the perfect position for God to work in your life."
I wiped away my tears and processed the wisdom God had given Al to speak. For the past 20 minutes, I had tearfully shared with Alfred, how I felt God was molding and shaping me, all the while using situations and circumstances that were downright uncomfortable. I explained to Alfred, how I felt that God was using these sandpaper-like situations to teach me how to be a daughter of His, and how to rest in His love; but I was confused. Shouldn't I as a Christian already know how to be a daughter of God?
Have you ever thought you passed a test in school, only years later realized you didn't pass the test, and now you needed to sit for the exam again?
This is how I felt. As someone who accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior at age 7, I felt confused (and even ashamed) each time the Holy Spirit prodded my heart about how I needed to truly learn what it means to be a daughter that truly rests and trusts in God.
When we accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior, we become children of God. However, God was showing me through everyday situations, that although my spiritual identity was as a daughter of God, often my emotions and actions did not reflect my spiritual identity.
Have you ever experienced moments where you didn't quite truly live up to who you know you were called to be?
Despite doing many cool things in the church and for God, at the age of 41, I feel like I am on the potter's wheel, and God is shaping and re-shaping me. Perhaps God is doing some work in your life too, and you are feeling His call to just snuggle up in His arms and just BE a daughter who loves her daddy and knows how to rest in Him.
After my snot-fest, tear-stained cheek car ride with my wise, loving, and practical husband, I've been reflecting a bit, and here are some things that I am learning on my journey to becoming a daughter of God that knows how to truly rest and trust in Him. From this sometimes-perfectionist-must be in control-doer, I'm learning to:
I'm learning to:
* Slooooooow Down. That's right. Instead of plowing through situations or circumstances that are hard or difficult. I am learning to slow down and invite God in. In order to fully rest in God's ability to handle my life, I'm slowing down to ask God for wisdom, discernment, and guidance.
* Think Like a Daughter. Currently, Al and I are opening a new sewing studio and although very exciting, there are anxiety-ridden moments where I am tempted to turtle and hide from life. But how should a daughter of God respond? I ask myself, what should the response be of the daughter who has a father in heaven that is the maker of all things? How should I respond to this obstacle knowing that I am loved, oh so dearly loved and nothing can separate me from God's love?
* Be Humble. I am realizing that I will never stop growing as God's daughter (duh!). God uses every situation to "perfect" and matures us in Him. The angst, confusion and even condemnation about feeling that I had somehow gone backward spiritually instead of forward, as I learn HOW to be a daughter that rests in God are (almost) going away. In humility, I realize that God is my father, teacher, master and I am HIS vessel. He has permission to mold, shape, teach and guide me. I am a ready student. Ready to learn and serve for His glory.
Hi, my name is Kacie Starr Long. I am an author, speaker and I love to use my voice to point people to Jesus. When I'm not writing, I'm either working out at Orange Theory Fitness or sewing. God delivered me from food addiction and I have a sewing ministry, called the Sew Hope Community Sewing Room . I am the proud wife of Alfred T. Long, Sr and together we lead a non-profit that serves prisoners and their families. Connect with me at www.InspiredOverflow.com and via my YouTube page for Christian teachings and encouragement.